An Interview with Mary Guignon Richards by Byron Richards
After many years of marriage my husband surprised me one day and said "I want to interview you to find out what makes you tick. I think your story would be quite interesting to many other women." And so I would like to start my story with this interview as a way to get to know me a bit better. In my journey I am also hoping to get to know many of you and hear your stories of lessons learned. Byron: You have been an advocate for natural health and women's health in particular for the past thirty years; tell us how you became interested in this subject?Mary: I was in nursing school and loved it, helping people was my passion. I liked talking to the patients and became fascinated with all the symptoms they were having that seemed to be coming from the drugs they were taking. I started reading the PDR in my off time and was intrigued by all the contraindications for the drugs. I saw these side effects in the patients but the doctors would ignore them and just give more drugs. I really had a huge dilemma; I wanted to tell the patients the symptoms were from the drugs but the doctors didn't like anyone questioning their authority. I decided right then and there that my mission in life was to help people and provide a better way. In LA I worked for one of the first alternative health doctors, and there I found my niche as a woman's health educator.
Byron: So many women today are overloaded with demands, children and family, running the home, work - women are seemingly expected to do it all. What is the best way to keep up with this wear and tear?
Mary: I laugh - but the first thing that comes to mind is my vitamins, especially the Daily Pack and Thyroid Helper. I make sure I get enough sleep and eat well. After that its making sure I find time for myself.
Byron: Raising four children and running Wellness Resources you've done this balancing act for many years, how have you prioritized the different demands on your time?
Mary: My children always came first, no matter what. Then I'd make sure I'm taking good care of myself. Then, I focused on working with others, helping others, something I have always enjoyed.
Byron: On the parenting side I can't help but notice that all of your children have high self esteem and are productive individuals who are an asset to society - what lessons did you instill along the way that you feel made a difference?
Mary: I think the biggest thing was teaching my children how to be problem solvers and independent thinkers. Sure I'd give them my guidance on solving the different problems they encountered, but I really encouraged them to come up with their own solutions. I taught them from a very early age not to care what other people thought about them, that they didn't have to follow someone else's path or expectations, and that they should think outside the box.
Byron: When women get in a mode of giving to everyone around them, which is so often the case, and many times without adequate acknowledgement or thanks I might add - How do you make time for yourself and not let someone else make you feel guilty about it?
Mary: That's a tough one, especially if you are a responsible person. I just did it. Sometimes I would just go in a room and lock the door behind me. I'd read; watch a little TV or just rest. The idea was to just let my brain relax and rest, time for myself. By the way, contrary to some belief, this is not selfish. It is important to take care of yourself so you can then be in good health and help others.
Byron: On this same topic, what is your favorite thing to do to rejuvenate?
Mary: That's easy, a long walk. During those child-raising years the best stress-reliever I had was a long walk with my husband - just talking and walking and enjoying the beautiful outdoors! Another thing is I always like to have a next break planned so I have something to look forward to, even if it's just a few days or a weekend trip or a date the following week. When something fun is on the calendar, even if it's a month or two off, then day-to-day tasks are less stressful.
Byron: Finding some kind of balance and inner harmony in your life is no easy task. I think a lot of people just keep searching - sometimes seemingly forever. What are your thoughts about this?
Mary: I understand that completely. My advice here is to look at what you've accomplished in your life and learn to acknowledge yourself. You have to be your own best friend. Once in a while I think to myself, if this was the last day of my life would I be happy with what I've accomplished? You can't wait around for others to pat you on the back in order to feel you've done a good job - you could be waiting a long time. Take a personal inventory of what you've achieved, keep working on your goals in a constructive way, and be nice to yourself. Feel free to tell yourself you're doing a great job.
Byron: Life is not without stress. A lot of people out there feel like giving up or starting their lives over. How have you stayed optimistic and had the energy to tackle the challenges?
Mary: I always challenge myself. I really believe there is nothing I can't do. I set goals. I just stay focused. I have high standards and I don't settle for less. My vitamins have really helped me a lot to keep my energy level up. There are days I feel that without them I would not be able to live the high paced life that I so enjoy. Thank you Byron for developing awesome vitamins for me and others, really, I am not just saying that.
Byron: Is there any particular woman in history you admire?
Mary: Anne Morgan, the daughter of JP Morgan. She was someone who was born into privilege and spent her life going against the expectations of her family position. She went out of her way to make a difference in others lives. She helped women find their new way entering the 20th century, she stood up for the rights of workers to the dismay of her father and his many industrialist friends, and she helped displaced families in France during WWI - using a lot of her own money to help others in need. She did not care that others saw her as the black sheep of the family. She went outside of the comfortable life she was provided and the expectations that are so often a shackle, and really made a difference on a personal level to so many others. Her life had meaning.
Byron: People learn so much going through life and it sure is nice when someone who's been there and done that can pass on some useful tips. Tell me something you've learned from someone a bit older than you?
Mary: It is always interesting to listen to someone older and ask them what decisions made a difference in their lives or what message they have learned. I think there is a lot to learn that way; older people are a warehouse of wisdom. I like listening to some of the stories of my friend Shirley, a very successful woman whose life was full of struggles and ended up being more of a riches to rags story than the other way around, and how despite this, her inner beauty shined. Her stories have helped me have more appreciation for what I already have and what I have already done - rather than always having to do something else before I can be happy. You realize that when you take away all the material things what's left is you. She has taught me to find more happiness in my current life, and thus more happiness within myself. It's like stopping to smell the roses - literally. She is a great gardener, and so I have taken up gardening as a hobby, something I would have never spent a lot of time on. I really enjoy it. The important point is being happy with yourself right now - I think that is a good way to live life and it's a common message I hear from people who are older.
Byron: You certainly are an example of what you advocate, here you are in your mid 50s, you're fit, you're healthy, and you look terrific. What's your secret?
Mary: Self discipline. I know that sounds a little odd but it's really true. I was raised to be a disciplined person and it has stuck with me and been a valuable tool. When you are self disciplined you make better use of your time, work hard, take good care of yourself, and don't compromise with what you know is right. It’s the best way to treat yourself well and be true to yourself. For some reason people associate fun with some sort of thrill or stimulus - I don't. I think self discipline helps make life fun and enjoyable. Another side of me is that I don't want to ever have to fit into a mold or pattern. When I see that happening I always want to do something new. Self discipline helps keep me grounded, like having a stable home camp. From there I like to explore. The bottom line is that life is what you create it to be.
